Nude man covered in cheese gets probation Says it all, really. In the ranking for "most disturbing yet touching story" is: Man accused of having relations with cows "A 63-year-old man is charged with sexual gratification with an animal for allegedly having sex with calves. "Harold G. Hart, of Neillsville, allegedly told police that he routinely stopped at a Greenwood farm, usually after bar closing or on trips to strip clubs near Marshfield or Neillsville." My favorite part: "He told police he never had sex with animals while maintaining a relationship with a girlfriend or his wife, the complaint said." See? He was faithful. Commitment means something, people!