Wild horses carrying bags of money could not possibly force me to watch the new reality show debuting on CBS January 10, "Armed and Famous," where C-list celebrities undergo police training and go on patrol in a small, soon-to-be-overrun-by-giggling-criminals Indiana town. However, CBS has thoughtfully posted the only portion of it that could possibly have appealed to me: LaToya Jackson getting tasered.
I'm thinking they should just drop the rest of the show and stick with this, maybe bring on some more gossip mag denizens every week to get tasered. I'd tune in to see Donald Trump and Rosie both go down twitching, wouldn't you? And who hasn't wanted to run voltage through K-Fed? They could hold contests to see who gets to zap Lindsay Lohan (one zap per winner, sorry). Who knows, maybe celebs will cut back on their public drunkenness, public sex life, and public belligerence if they know they'll get tasered because of it.
Nah. "Shock and Woo!" coming soon, to FOX!
Okay, that tasering suggestion is just sick. Fun but sick.
Oh man, that'd be a great show! How about this wrinkle, though…a live audience who judge the celebs' reactions to tasering. The one with the highest score comes back next week. The winner of the grand finale show during sweeps week gets a 1 season contract for the lead in a weekly 1/2-hour drama or sitcom.