Posts Tagged ‘contest’

Well, it is a review, but mostly it was a contest entry for McSweeney's recent columnist contest. I didn't win so you get it as a blog entry. Here's what I submitted:

Life Lessons, by C. A. Bridges

My columns, should you choose to accept them, would be a variety of subjects with the common thread being the real life lessons I take away. Example:

Review: “The Graveyard Book,” by Neil Gaiman

Ordinarily one might think I have no reason to read a children’s book, as I am no longer a child and frankly wasn’t much of one to begin with. But there are lessons to be learned from all books great and small, and I loathe missing the chance for enrichment in any form.

This particular form is currently garnering all the praise it can get. Hordes of critics, writers’ organizations and librarians, working in shifts, have been feverishly devising new awards to quickly bestow upon this lively (ha!) tale of a small, recently orphaned boy raised by ghosts in a graveyard. Morbid as the subject may be, the lessons the boy garners are valuable ones indeed. Lessons of bravery, common sense and deduction, stories of responsibility and valor. Lessons valuable enough, in fact, that even after only a few short chapters I judged them worthy enough to be passed to all children.

I started small, with a nephew.

Jimbo, as he was unfortunately known, was a particularly sticky and noisome boy, with an equally annoying family (sorry, sis). My intended program of involuntary personal growth could only benefit him. But I decided, upon reflection, that it would be unnecessarily cruel to actually murder his parents, as well as being too much work. Instead I offered to feed and water him for a weekend so that his newly emancipated mother and father might enjoy the bliss of a quiet house, and then, once he was in my clutches, I merely informed him that he was now an orphan.

I had been concerned that the lack of physical violence in his presence might fail to suitably traumatize him for my purposes but as it turned out, detailed, step-by-step description of his parents’ fictional, horrendous demise was quite enough, especially when I added the appropriate gestures and sound effects. This was an excellent sign! A traumatized child is a child ready to learn. It was off to the graveyard!
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Tell QMx what Serenity means to you – in words, verse, artwork, whatever – and you may win nifty prizes up to an Inara's Shuttle diorama.

The shuttle diorama features one of the 2.5-inch, hand-painted Serenity shuttles from the Big Damn Replica, hovering over it’s own little landing platform with the words “Serenity” and “Inara’s Shuttle” laser cut into its surface. Only 10 of these have been made and one of them already went to Jane Espenson (which only seems fitting as the shuttle diorama was originally her idea.)

Or you can follow QMx on Twitter; they'll be pulling a random follower to win another shuttle diorama. Or you can impress them with how well you encouraged other people to follow them and win another diorama.

Entries should be sent to admin@fireflyshipworks.com by Sept. 15, 2009, winners will be announced Oct. 15. Click here for more details.

Second challenge, round one, of NYCMidnight's Creative Writing Championship. This time my group was given "Genre: Fantasy, Location: Travel Agency, Object: Lobster." Well, that seemed pretty obvious…

"TransmogriVacations, Inc."

by C. A. Bridges (1,000 words)

“A lobster? An actual crawling around, dunk it in butter lobster?”

“It’s what we have available right now in your price range, sir. Lobster, beetle, or vulture. Live your dream, sir.”

“What kind of beetle?”

“Dung.”

Parkleman sighed and slumped in the chair. “I’m in accounting,” he muttered, looking around the travel agency. “Dealing with balls of crap ten times my size is precisely what I’m trying to get away from.”

The sign over the door read “TRANSMOGRIVACATIONS, INC.” and in smaller script underneath: “BE ALL SOMETHING ELSE CAN BE.” There was an enchanted logo next to it depicting a cartoon man changing into a lion, a dolphin, an eagle, and then a man again, over and over. Parkleman stared at it for a long moment.

“You can really change me into anything I want to be?” he asked again.

The mage behind the desk raised an eyebrow.

“Anything I can afford, I mean?” Read the rest of this entry »

ThinkGeek is celebrating their 10th year by sending you piles of stuff. I mean, a lot of stuff.

3 winners will be drawn and will get the following prize packs:

* Grand Prize: $1200 ThinkGeek.com Shopping Spree
* A 'Taun Taun' Sleeping Bag Prototype
* ThinkGeek Homepage features you for a day
* A batch of cookies made by ThinkGeek Staff
* A small box of random doodads recently found in a closet

* Second Place Prize: $500 ThinkGeek Shopping Spree
* We'll incorporate your 'likeness' into a future ThinkGeek T-shirt
* Three Random ThinkGeek Office Decoration Pieces – Including a 10" vinyl sleestack collectible with bonus Mardi Gras necklace
* "Signed" Print by Cisco (using his paw), ThinkGeek's original office dog

* Third Place Prize: $250 ThinkGeek Shopping Spree
* We'll incorporate you into a future ThinkGeek Youtube video
* Pre-ripped wearable action hero cotton vest tee
* 22 random Atari 2600 cartridges

All you do is enter. Can't get much easier than that, people.

The West Port Book Festival is hosting their first Literary Twestival in Edinburgh on August 14th. But you don't have to be within a thousand miles of the place to participate…

Just post your short-short-short story to your Twitter account and include the hashtag #wpss (for West Port Short Story). The best will be presented ay the Festival, as people on site are invited to create their own on the spot. Or submit a Collective Noun for their approval (such as "A wunch of bankers," " ______ of mime artists,"A whorde of prostitutes," etc).

No prizes (that I know of), just the fun of stretching your mind in a little tiny space. And check out the ones already submitted here.

I've got two Dollhouse DVD sets to give away, one for the winner voted on by you people, and one pulled at random from all the entries. Why would you hire a doll?

The winner by vote is Mike Mueller, for "Because I have a perfectly good see-saw that's just sitting there. It's just sad."

And the random choice winner is David Pickett! (His entry, for the curious, was  "So i could talk to myself without looking crazy.")

Congratulations gentlemen, and thanks to every who participated! And a big thank you to Scott Neumyer from Click Communications for letting me do this.

If you didn't get one here, fret not. The Dollhouse Season One DVD hits the streets next Tuesday. All 13 episodes (including the unaired "Epitaph One")  and the unaired pilot, "Echo," plus commentaries, deleted scenes and tons of features. See my mini-review here.  Preorder it at Amazon for the best price: at the moment, $29.99 for the regular one, $47.99 for Blu-Ray.

I'm extending the deadline for the Dollhouse Season One DVD contest so that you can vote for one of the winners until 9 p.m. EST tomorrow night (Wednesday, July 22), because I screwed up.

Since Saturday there's been a graphic on BashingInMinds.com leading you to vote for the entries you liked, but the link was wrong. You could still find where to vote by searching or scrolling through posts or from my Twitter posts about it, but visitors to the site wouldn't find it easily.

The link has been fixed, and so I'm adding an extra day until closing the voting. Here's where to go. I apologize for any inconvenience.

Clock's ticking! You've got til midnight tonight, EST, for a chance to win a copy of the Dollhouse Season One DVD set.

Just head here and tell me why you'd hire a doll.

Two sets will be given away; one to a random winner, and one to the entry you select from the best 10, which I'll be posting tomorrow.

Winners will be announced Tuesday, July 21, so folks going to Comic-Con will know if they should be trying to buy one or not.

Don't miss your chance!

In honor of their 25th anniversary and their new album "Back From the Dead," just released last month, Spinal Tap is asking the fans to get involved.

David St. Hubbins, Derek Smalls and Nigel Tufnel of Spinal Tap are inviting fans to create an original video to be posted on YouTube for one of the following songs off of their album BACK FROM THE DEAD — Hell Hole, Warmer Than Hell, Big Bottom, Stonehenge, Back From The Dead and/or Short & Sweet. Judging the contest, will be Colman Hickey, who created the classic video for Tonight I'm Gonna Rock You Tonight using characters made of Legos.

One lucky winner will receive an autographed, limited edition Spinal Tap prize pack!

No idea what the autographed prize pack consists of, but what the hell. More details available at YouTube and you can see a sample contest entry here.

Also they've produced an official Spinal Tap iPhone app. Listen to music, watch videos, get the latest Tap news, and see what other fans are writing on their wall. Free app, but it looks like you'll need to be connected to get anything from it so put it on the phone or keep your iPod Touch near a wifi connection.

If you haven't picked up the new CD "Back From the Dead," you should. Amazon has it for just $10.99 and you get 19 original songs, a one-hour DVD, and a "unique pop-up diorama package that unveils three 12-inch action figures (courtesy of Sideshow Collectibles) of the band along with a proportionally sized Stonehenge." What's not to love?

Announcing BashinginMinds' first giveaway: two Dollhouse Season One DVD sets!

Season one of Joss Whedon's controversial series Dollhouse will be hitting the streets on July 28, but you can win one a week early. All you have to do is tell me this:

Why would you hire a doll?

Please keep comments under 50 words or so, and relatively PG-13. Otherwise, go wild. Please use the form below; entries posted as a comment to this post will not be entered.

Entries must be received by midnight EST on Friday, July 17, 2009, and there will be two ways to win. First, I'll select the best 10 and put those up for a vote, winner gets a DVD set. And I'll select a name at random from all the entries for the other set. Winners will be announced Tuesday, July 21, so folks going to Comic-Con will know if they should be trying to buy one or not…

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